august fourteenth two thousand twenty six
happy friday cuties.
today is just one of those days that i feel overly emotional and i feel as i'm extra sensitive. i'm always constantly thinking about things people say to me, their actions, and how they make me feel. no matter if it was recently, months ago, or even years ago. i feel like sometimes i don't deal with things the right way and i just kind of push my emotions down and try to forget about them. then eventually on days like today something will trigger me or hurt my feelings and i feel everything at once and it just makes me sad and super anxious. my entire life i've been told i'm so sensitive, i'm a cry baby, i always let people get the best of me but its like how could i not be? it's hard to push down my emotions and not let things bother me. and i feel like sensitivity shouldn't be so frowned upon??? i don't know. sometimes i wish i didn't feel anything at all. like shut my emotions off and just feel nothing. is life better that way? are people happier not feeling anything. on the other hand who am i without my emotions? i cry about everything, when i feel someone is upset at me, when i feel overwhelmed and tired someone changes their tone/raises their voice at me, someone changes their energy, literally everything makes me cry and just want to shut down. my mom always tells me to not let people get to me but i really don't know how. i really do feel like i feel too much. i'm kind of over it, it gets exhausting after a while. its weird because most of the time i feel fine then one little thing will happen then i'm emotionally exhausted for daysssss. but i honestly feel like that's just being a girl. feeling everything so deeply almost on a molecular level is just apart of the job. gonna try to meditate to reground myself and my emotions. is there such thing as feeling too much? and is there a cure for crybaby syndrome? i'm over it. ttyl xoxo.
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